Another Page Turns....

On May 14th Dom lost his battle with Cancer, though he NEVER stopped fighting. From the time this site was created to that last day he was trying with everything he had to find another facility and / or doctor that would accept him and his case. It seemed like just when were making some forward motion something else knocked us back 10 steps. At this point, I'm not even sure how many different places we contacted, but no one was willing to try to help. Dom battled several infections during the last couple of months as well; some of which caused him to have to go through pic line replacements, a very uncomfortable procedure. Through it all Dom kept his sense of humor and never complained about the personal Hell he was going through. In his many attempts to write his thoughts down one of his main concerns was not of himself but of those he would be leaving behind. Don't get me wrong, he was scared and wasn't ready to give up the fight and go Home. But, he wanted to ensure we knew life "must" go on and asked that we don't let his loss devestate us.

I know in my heart that even though my pain seems too much to bare at times, his is finally over and he is in God's loving arms. His struggle for life is finally over; he no longer has to fight. Now, instead of me trying to take care of him, he's looking down from Heaven watching out for me.

Rough treatment from the cancer center

From Christy:

Early Christmas morning Dom went to the hospital for a bowel obstruction. We was in a local hospital two days while they ran testing on him. Once it was discovered he had cancer he was shipped off to the Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa. They hooked him up to an IV and gave him something for the pain and waited. A week went by and nothing changed other than how distended his bowel kept getting. Finally, after a week of waiting, he vomited enough to fill a two liter bottle. We went to the nurses station and had to demand to see a doctor. He told us if we had questions we needed to wait until the morning rounds. I had to get mad with him and tell him "something WILL be done tonight!!" I stated this has now become a change of status in this patient and I'm not leaving until someone does something for him tonight. I was told that I don't know what happens at the hospital during the day because I'm not here and that is not a change of status in him. I actually had to say "yesterday he wasn't throwing up, today he IS throwing up. That IS a change of status in the patient, so get us a doctor up here tonight!" When the doctor finally showed up to put a tube in his nose to decompress his stomach, they couldn't get it to go in. He grabbed it from them and put it in himself. That was just the beginning.

They had to give him some potassium because his was low. So they hooked him up to an IV in his arm. They failed to tell him how it could burn as it goes in. It lit his arm on fire from the inside and brought tears to his eyes. So the nurse clamped it off and switched arms for the IV. She didn't start the potassium up, she left it clamped off. Dom went to sleep for a while, and while he was sleeping a nurse (one that wasn't even on his case that day) walked by his room and saw the IV clamped off, went in the room and unclamped the potassium. So now it's flowing into his other arm waking him up to pain. He started screaming for help and to get it off. The lady that unclamped it stood in the door and told him she's not going to do anything with his attitude, AND called security on him. The whole while this stuff is pumping into his veins and hurting him. It ended up collapsing veins in both of his arms and caused him to have to go through minor surgery for a pic line to be put in a main vessel into his heart.

They had him with the NG tube in his nose for a while as well to help relieve the pressure in his stomach until the blockage worked its way out. One night, while he was sleeping, the tube came out of his nose. The next morning he asked if someone would help him put it back in because he was feeling really bloated again. His nurse refused saying the Dr had to re-order it. He finally grabbed the tube and put in in himself, for the second time. Shortly after this they took the tube out of his nose and put him through minor surgery to insert a stomach tube for use with a suction pump when the pressure builds up too much in his stomach and begins to make him feel sick.

The pic line got infected later of course causing a fever to spike. They gave him some antibiotics through IV but his temperature kept rising. I was asking if there was anything to give him to keep the fever from going up, like Tylenol and they kept telling me "He's on antibiotics." His fever went from 101.2 to 102.7 with me steady asking them before they finally gave him some Tylenol. His temp maxed out at 103.1 even with me having ice packs for him and wiping him down with a cool rag. This whole time I may have seen a nurse come in once or twice to change the antibiotics but never did anything more to try to help break the fever. When the group of doctors came in that morning I was told it was good to have a fever, that shows the body is fighting off the infection. I looked at the nurse and asked "you mean 102 and 103 degree temperature is GOOD for you???" They stuttered a "well, no that is a little high." I stayed the night with him to help watch his temperature and woke up to him with a 103.7 temp. So, here we go again with the ice pack, cool rag, Tylenol regimen. They finally determine it is his pic line that is infected and pull it out of one arm and put another one in his other one.

The whole time Dom was in the hospital they were changing his diet on a constant basis. One morning, he'd be on a clear liquid diet only, lunch would be a full liquid, then dinner would be soft mechanical. Breakfast the next day would be back to nothing by mouth at all, everything via IV. Then back to clear liquids again. He got to a point one time that he was comfortable to be able to eat small amounts of food and have it able to go through his system with out any problems so immediately they put him on a full soft diet and took him off all IVs. We told them that if he was put back on the pill form of the pain medication he would get blocked up again but of course the doctors thought they knew more and put him right back on the pills. The next day, he was bloated up again, unable to pass any food through his digestive tract and had to hook back up to the suction pump to relieve the pressure in his stomach. Then all of a sudden the hospital staff orders more x-rays and a ct scan to see what happened.

Then came the fun. We were told by some people that he went from a 60% chance to beat this down to a 0% chance to beat this. We had another one say he had 2 months left, then another that said there's no way to tell how long or what his chances are. We had so many different people give us so many different opinions on what was happening next we didn't know which way was up. We didn't know who was telling the truth or who just didn't know what they were talking about. We had one doctor show us the last two CT scans side by side and told us that it looks like it got worse in the last two months, then the primary doctor told us that it didn't look worse but it didn't get better either. No one at Moffitt was ever able to give us a straight answer about anything. All we heard is "we have to talk to Dr C about that." And of course no one ever came back to us with those answers. Dom spent more than two months in Moffitt Cancer Center and during that time, NO ONE "EVER" spoke positive to him at all. They only spoke of Death, him Dying, and Doom every day. He got so depressed, there were nights I would drive up to Tampa, an hour away, after leaving work at 10pm just to make sure he was OK and wasn't giving up.

That hospital tried to kick him out of there so many times too that we couldn't believe it. It actually got to the point that the case worker for us told Dom's Brother in Law that they didn't care if Dom went to a homeless shelter, he wasn't staying there any longer. They tried to get him in an Adult Care facility that wasn't suitable for a family pet much less my husband. When I told them I wasn't sending him there, they did everything they could to get him out in other ways. Half way through his time at Moffitt they would argue with us about him not being able to go home on a pain pump or TPN (IV nutrition) and yet now, he is at home with both. I am having to become a "home nurse" along with being a wife to an ill husband, and still be a mother to our son, and still play housewife to keep the house clean, and make sure bills stay paid, and still hold down a full time job. Somewhere within all that "free time" I HAVE TO make calls and send records to different locations that may give us other options for his care. I honestly don't know how I'm going to do this.

Last night, while the Home Health Nurse was at the house, he suggested, from what he saw in the records that he was sent, that we obtain an attorney so they can go through all of his medical records. He thinks, as we did, that Moffitt is giving up on Dom's care and are no longer going to aggressively treat or attempt to fight this cancer. I don't believe in giving up, myself. I've found a few options out there that I want to try, one in Chicago, one in North Carolina or North Dakota which ever one takes him. The Block Center in Chicago does a combination treatment with nutrition, chemo, and supplements, along with treating the spiritual man as well. North Dakota and North Carolina has been using a new procedure with surgery and a hypothermic form of chemo to treat the tumors. I know exploring all the options is going to take time and money, both are a luxury we don't exactly have right now.

-- Christy

Trajedy strikes

From Christy:

We’ve had some tough times just like everyone does, but recently it’s been harder than we ever expected. Dom was diagnosed with colon cancer at the age of 37. He under went surgery with a general surgeon who stated he had some of the worst cancer he’d ever seen and was given a colostomy bag for his waste. Then he had to go through chemo, and radiation for what seemed like an eternity. He did everything he could to be there for his family regardless of what he was going through. He went to all of his follow up appointments with his doctor and was told he was cancer free!

This went on for 3 ½ years. He began getting bowel obstructions and ended up in the hospital a few times for weeks at a time. Right before Christmas his doctor called saying something in his blood work didn’t look right and that he needed to come in for a PET scan. Before even getting the results of the scan he was back in the hospital, Christmas Day.

For the last two months, he’s been going through hell at a Cancer Center in Tampa. It has finally gotten to the point where we believe they will do more harm than good as they “wait” to figure out what their next move should be. In the mean time I am trying everything I can to get him to a cancer center in Chicago, IL that will give him a chance to beat this. It’s called the Block Center for Integrative Cancer Treatment.

I am asking if any of you are willing or able to help me raise the funds needed to get him there please follow the link on the right-hand side for PayPal. It doesn’t matter how big or small, every cent will be GREATLY appreciated and it will ONLY be used for his care and treatment.

Thank you for taking the time to read our story and look at our pictures. I know he has a chance to be around a while longer, he’s certainly not ready to give up. Thank you for your prayers and those of you that can assist in other ways as well.

God Bless!

-- Christy

Who is Dominic Monte?

From Christy:

He’s the kind of guy it seems you either love him or hate him. We love him with all of our hearts.

Dominic and I met in an unconventional way at the time. I would have never believed I’d meet my husband in a cell phone chat room, but I did! It was January in 2003, the day after my son’s 3rd birthday. I went into the chat rooms on my Sprint cell phone to help pass the time at night; little did I know he was doing the same thing 400 miles away. I was using an alias of Nicole. I didn’t want anyone to know my real name because I wasn’t there to "meet" anyone.

The funny part about that is, if I had used my real name, Dom would have NEVER instant messaged me. His sister and I share names, so he would have avoided me at all costs. He used a shortened version of his name, Dom. When he requested a private chat with me he was actually looking for someone he knew by the name of Nicole. I almost denied his request, but changed my mind and accepted.

I think we only "chatted" for about 5 minutes before we couldn’t wait to talk and called each other. Sixteen hours later we said good night. The following night we talked for another eight hours. Needless to say, he got me, hook, line, and sinker; I was his.

We talked like this for the next two weeks, falling asleep to each other’s breath on the other end of the phone. I finally got the courage to go meet him, but this would mean me leaving my son with my parents, and driving alone four and a half hours from home. I remember thinking "you’re either really crazy or really stupid, or both." I didn’t really know this guy and I was going to be alone with him for the weekend, with no back up plan.

Turns out luck or God or both were on my side. After getting lost upon arriving in St. Petersburg and finding out I was only 4 blocks away I finally walked in his door. We had one of the best weekends of our lives. Two weeks later, shortly after Valentine’s Day my son and I moved in with him. Not only did he accept me for who I was but he also accepted my son, Joey, as his own.

We’ve been together ever since!

Every Halloween Dom would carve a Jack O Lantern with Joey. We loved the few times we got to go camping together. He even introduced my son and I to the Classic Rock band "Boston." Dom had followed them since he was nine years old. They had become a very big part of his life. We were able to go to a couple concerts with him, which made Joey fall in love with the drums. He plays air drum now to just about every song that has a good drum line in it.

Joey wants to be just like Dom, like I’m sure most boys want to be like their Dad. He tells me all the time he wants to lift weights so he can be strong like him. And Joey’s already trying to cook so he can be as good as his "Daddy."

We’ve become a real close family, so when we learned that he has cancer yet again, we all suffered with him.

-- Christy